I'm craving for love being showered over me............. But then again, I think I must be strong ............. Be independent enough to stand on my own without anything.............. I can't stand the sight of him anymore.............. It's just making me miserable and depressed............... I need to find a way out.............. To get out of there and start anew.............

There are so many different kinds of men in this world............. Some are basically just a women-player who likes to go KTV, gambling, alcohol, massage, club-hoppers to check out chicks, one-night stands etc...... This kind really irks me.......... Another is a Mr Nice-guy kind who already is going to be extinct in this world - they are patient, soft-hearted, understanding, tolerant and kind towards women, the ideal man that a gal needs......... Too bad, I haven't experienced such a guy yet.......... Another kind is simply just want to enjoy life, fuck-care attitude, isn't interested in gals at all........... ....Have seen a few of this but then again, they are either gays or bisexuals..... *sigh*.............. I think all the good guys in this world are either dead or taken up.

Just came back from Zouk-Out.......... Whole body is sticky and dirty........... ..... Was feeling hungry after all the drinks and boogie....... Wobble down a packet of chips and 2 durians ......... Feeling guilty about it......
Anyway, didn't really have a good sleep since Friday's night.........My itinery for the day was all packed..........Was supposed to study on Friday's night but in the end, fell asleep and woken at 6 am........ rush thru my notes.......... Went for my exams in the morning, then lunch and window-shopping wit classmates after that....... then went home... nap for 20 mins.........then woken up by fren's call..........rush to prepare for dinner with frens at Marina Bay (yeah! Missed that! Haven't been there to eat the steamboat for awhile!).........then to Marina Square to load ourselves up wit alcohol (all of us wanna get high before we go in)........ proceed to Zouk-Out.............Drinking and lancing (drinks sucks, not strong enough) ....... Met my colleagues while there........ Hang out with them......... Left Zouk-Out..........Went to S11 for chilled drinks again............... and FINALLY home sweet home.........Now I need a good bath before I go for my dreamland.

Oh ya.. before I go..... I need to blog this first......... I had one of my embarrassing moments of my life today............. While having my exams........... my stomach made a very loud rumbling noise...........And it's not once......... but TWICE............ at different times.......... And I was sitting right in front of the exam room..........And the invesgilator was right in front of me......... I didn't dare to look at him.......... My face was root-red and I wish I can find a hole and hide myself.......... I'm sure those sitting near me would hear the noises..........I pretended to continue writing my answers, but I felt so embarrased....... My stomach always have this kind of funny noises in the morning........ Guess too much air in there........ Or maybe I'm hungry? heh.. I think I wanna see a doctor soon..

Why does the world has to revolve around money?!?............. I don't understand at all........... This is such a sickening world!.......... I NEED lots of money............. BUT then........... *sigh*................ I rather live in the magical world.... I'm going to play my diablo II to forget all my worries.

Someone gave me a Queen Amidalia (Natalie Portman)'s figurine to cheer me up........ He told me the figurine symbolised "grrl power'.......... I don't get what he meant by that and also the reason for giving the figurine to me but then I am quite touched by that........ He is a Star Wars' collectors and he is really rare that he will give one of his favourite figurine to me........... Oh well......

My workplace might have some changes soon......... I just came to know about to news yesterday............. I don't know whether is it good or bad.......... We shall see.....

I am sick of having relationship...... Sick of not being appreciated by things that I have done.......... Sick of having to spare the feelings and thoughts of someone else............. Sick of having to give in for quarels........ Sick of getting the indirect hints............. Sick of guessing what the other party is thinking..................Sick of understanding the person............ Sick of apologising things which I think I am not in the wrong............ Sick of ........ arrrghghgh.....whatever!........... I just hate relationship now!........... I might turn into a nun soon...

I had a big quarel with one of my colleague yesterday.... Big as in really MAJOR kind of heated exchange of words....This is the first time that I have expressed my anger so openly and expressively in office........ After that, I went out to the toilet and cried my hearts out........ I cried becos I am seriously angry beyond words but at the same time, sad and sorry for myself that I am treated like shit in the office........ That asshole is a mother^%&*@*$#@ with his balls hiding inside his ass!!!! (Sorry for being so crude and vulgar here! But this is the only place where I can show my own true emotions and feelings here...cos it is MY blog!!).......... Can't imagine having to face him 5 days a week, 9 hrs a day for the next....hmm.... dun know how long I will last also..... Anyway, I had a really bad day at work and the only thing that can relieve me from all these stuffs is going for retail therapy..Blah

My fren brought his golden retriever out for dinner on Sat, and to admit honestly, I have a phobia towards animals even if they are harmless ones like dogs or cats..... however, I'm surprised at myself that I stroked, fed and touch my fren's dog that day...... I felt a sudden liking towards it...... I have managed to curb half of my fear factor..... I even have a sudden urge to get myself a small puppy..... Dogs are known to be loyal to humans..... At least, they won't break your heart and I can have a companion to keep me company when I am sad, depressed, lonely etc...

Anyhow, last Friday's Zouk-In was boring..... Place was bloody packed........I wonder if this year's Zouk-Out will be better than the previous year..... A new venue to hold the 2 days event for this year.......... Definately a refreshing change.......But I'm definately gonna missed the first day.

I'm feeling lazy over the weekend..... supposed to go jogging and sun-bathing with 2 of my guy frens but in the end, I slept my afternoon away and only managed to get my butt out of the house in the evening when the sun was going to set.... I can never get my exercise regimen started..... I'm incurable..... I'm just a lazy ass...

I have missed my class for 2 weeks plus...... It seems that I have lost my motivation and drive to study.......... Moreover, school fees is long overdue but I haven't opened my mouth and get the money from my dad yet............. I always have difficulty in asking parents for money......... I felt embarassed and a burden to them, having to take their money even after I have started working...... But then again, I dun have much saving to sponsor myself thru school.......... Hence, can only depend on them.... *sigh*........... Felt like giving up...... But then, there are only 3 more modules to go before I FINALLY can get that paper qualification........*sigh*...... I am stressed!

OMG! I appeared in U-Weekly together with one of my company's artiste. It's a small pic though but then....... Oh Gosh... Oh Gosh.....

Wow! Blogger has a new design and look.... Splendid!

I'm busy......... Yes...... Very BUSY indeed.......... It should be a good sign I guess......... BUSY is always better than iddling/doing nothing.